One-way ticket to parenthood please...

Yes, that is correct... Parenthood is a one-way ticket...

I make this analogy based in how I was felling today... just to let you know, today Sunday 22nd of February, is the day when Zlata is going to the hospital and spend the night there before our son Eduardo Josef is born tomorrow Monday 23rd of February 2009.

So, in the morning we woke up, I prepared breakfast, we made sure we had everything we need ready, the bag with the clothes, etc...

At this moment, I just said to Zlata... "You know my love... I have now a similar filling to another feeling I had before already 4 times..."

In case you didn't know, Eduardo Josef is my very first child, so it was very curious for Zlata that I said that I have had a similar feeling already 4 times before!

Then, I explained...

"Yes, I'm having feelings right now very similar to the days I was just about to fly to a new country to move there for a longer period than 6 months..."

So, I had similar feelings the same day I was going to travel to Madison, Wisconsin when I was 19, and also I felt similar when I went to Cali, Colombia when I was 25, and when I went to Estonia a year after that, and to Malaysia more recently.

I've been in many other places also traveling for vacations, but these 4 destinations were in particular very special since I was not going for a short period, and in all of those 4 occasions I was not sure what was going to be my next destination, nor if I was ever going back to anywhere...

You might be thinking that such a situation might have made me feel unhappy or scared or nervous... but if you know me well, then you know that I was totally the opposite!

I was always very happy, even calm... but definitely looking forward to the new adventure!

Going back to the conversation I had with Zlata, I explained her then that at that particular moment I was feeling in the same way I felt 4 times in the day I was going to travel.

The curious thing is that the feeling is... like if I'm not going anywhere!

Yes... those 4 times, exactly at the day of the travel, even being at te airport just before boarding... I was feeling nothing special... It was for me just like the day before... just that I was carrying 2 big suitcases, one carry-on and my backpack...

And so far, my feelings are still very similar to those 4 moments, and they are evolving in the same way too...

Here is how it goes:

1) As I described before, at the begining I'm just calm, not feeling any special or different emotions even at the airport, even after checking my bags.

2) Then, I'm in the plane... and then there is a change... I'm still calmed, but now after I left behind all other ties I had to the day before... my mind starts to wonder in short term memories, about things I was living in the past months... then (since usually the trip is for more than 8 hours) I fall asleep....

3) I wake-up... I'm still in the plane, and there is still half way to go... emotions are now different... I'm now trying to imagine how will it be to cross the door outside of the airport, and meet new people and a new enviroment... I just try to get the feeling of been there.

4) I arrive... and I'm in a totally new world, different to any thought before, and I'm very excited and looking forward to explore every corner...




For me, I can apply this same analogy to the experience of becoming father... right now I'm already in the 3rd step...

And tomorrow I will arrive...
...to my only one-way destination to parenthood.